Hello world!

I’m turning 50 this year and to be really honest – it feels like a big, damn cliff. Not the type that you’re kind of excited to see because it’s gorgeous and inspiring in a grandiose kind of way. The kind that you’re standing at the top of, looking down at the ocean beating on the rocks below and you’re thinking “oh, shit, I’m pretty sure that I just felt the ground start to shift beneath me.” Yeah, that kind.

This summer, a few things happened that made me think about my life forward in new ways – that damn cliff image popping into my brain on the regular was one of them. Another was a chance comment by my friend, Esme, during a tubing trip. We were floating (drinks in hand, of course) past a fly fisherman, and I said “Oh, I’ve always wanted to learn how to do that.” Esme, always the truth teller, said “Well, why don’t you?” WHY DON’T I??? I’ve been saying that I want to learn for YEARS, decades even. I’m certainly not getting any younger… Hmmm…

Then my mom and my sister, Diana, went on a girls’ vacation to Colorado this summer. Such a fun adventure! Hiking and touring and photography and food and hot springs and alpine tundra. Near the end of the trip, Diana asked me “Where to next year?” What a great question, sister dear.

My bucket list keeps getting longer… My kids are getting older… My days keep getting busier…

So this year, I’m doing something a little different. I’m setting some intentional plans into motion and I’m calling it The 50 List – a list of things that I want to learn, places I want to go, and experiences I want to have the year that I turn 50. Step 1 was creating a blog to share these experiences, because I am, at my core, a connector, and connections, virtual and in-person, are critical to my well-being.

My daughter, Mary, who is at 16 years old an amazing writer and creative powerhouse, suggested a blog name of Half-Century Helpline. But I think that while this blog will help me, I have no expectations of truly helping anyone else. Instead I’m calling it the heartline because I do want to create heart connections and a way to share experiences, thoughts, feelings, and adventures. And since I know that there are many other people, particularly women of a certain age like me, who want to add some magic and dreams and good madness into their lives, I had to pull from my favorite author, Neil Gaiman (it’s his quote that’s on the home page of this blog).

Below is The 50 List so far – some of these items will be solo adventures but a lot are open to friends and family that would like to join me. I want to add to it also – so hit me up with your suggestions or adventure dreams. Want to sing karaoke at a cowboy bar? I’ll wear my red boots. Interested in exploring a cemetery at the full moon? I’ve got a cloak and a flask of bourbon. Dance class, your favorite band playing, open mic night, or a glass of wine in the back yard talking about all of the important dreams we have? I’m all in (and especially for that last one).

This year is going to be wicked hard, but I’m determined to enjoy the shit out of it.

The 50 List (in no particular order):

• See the Northern Lights,
• Visit the Isle of Skye,
• Finish the Bay Bridge Run,
• Accomplish a yoga handstand,
• Learn to fly fish,
• Finish Les Miserables,
• Hike the Appalachian Trail through Shenandoah National Park,
• Kayak the North Branch Susquehanna Water Trail,
• Take a belly dancing class,
• Take a self defense class,
• Take a drawing class,
• Learn to ski,
• Learn to drive a stick shift,
• Learn how to blog (ta da!),
• Take a meditation retreat,
• Have a meal at Chez Panisse and French Laundry, and
• Visit Tangier Island.